Tuesday, 31 May 2016

Sent a letter to herself dullness

Hull Daily Mail: Girl is so bored she sends a letter to herself. The Hull Daily Mail is there

Honestly, this is a full-page feature with photos and video. Only the Queen falling under a bus would get more.

Monday, 30 May 2016

Dead duck dullness

South Wales Argus: Popular duck dies

Fifteen paragraphs on a dead duck, including this:

"One family, who don’t wish to be named, have said they are sad she's gone."

Spotter's Badge: Nick

Sunday, 29 May 2016

Johnny Depp Norwich Bathtub rumours dullness

Eastern Daily Press: Did Johnny Depp really buy a bath tub in Norwich a year ago?

Let the man explain himself:

"We disposed of the thing and everything’s fine" 

He really could be history's greatest monster.

Spotter's Badge: Norbet

Roundabout Dullness

Having trouble getting to sleep at night? This blow-by-blow account of minor roadworks in Wagga Wagga will help you get a full eight hours. (Source: Daily Advertiser)

Spotter's Badge: Jacquie

Saturday, 28 May 2016

Goggles dullness

Oxford Mail: Man to sell some comics so he can buy goggles to help fly his drone

I'm planning on taking a crap in about ten minutes, but I haven't felt the urge to go to the papers (I just put it on this award-worthy website)

Spotter's Badge: Richard

Friday, 27 May 2016

Wednesday, 25 May 2016

Hole in the ground dullness

Maidenhead Advertiser: Hole appears outside pub

10,000 points to the sub who got "Police are looking into it" into the story.

Spotter's Badge: Rob A

Monday, 23 May 2016

Duck dullness

One MK: Duck invasion reaches Tesco supermarket near  Milton Keynes

In the words of Danny Dyer: "Look at them, the arrogant little shitters"

Spotter's Badge: Adam

 Mid Devon Gazette: Ducks cross road

That's it. Ducks cross road.

Spotter's Badge: Kieran

Sunday, 22 May 2016

Traffic gridlock dullness

Eastern Daily Press: Tractor breaks down in Norfolk

You would have thought that a Norfolk-based newspaper would have had a few pictures of tractors lying around. Nope.

Spotter's Badge: Steven

Saturday, 21 May 2016

Even Elton John needs a wee dullness

Bexley News Shopper: Elton takes a wee in local pub

Nobody saw his Candle* in the wind.

* Penis

Spotter's Badge: Neil

Pig on the loose dullness

Bradford Telegraph and Argus: Pig on the loose in Fagley

Contains the immortal eye-witness account: "Seen the pig on Fagley Road other day lol"

Spotter's Badge: Sarah

Friday, 20 May 2016

Missing tortoise dullness

Gloucestershire Echo: Have you seen this tortoise?

Police confirm that the search area has been widened to a massive 50 metres

Spotter's Badge: Mike

Thursday, 19 May 2016

Sunday, 15 May 2016

Street light dullness

Shropshire Star: Bin lorry knocks street light over

Lighting a candle for the people of Market Drayton. Because they'll need it until this is fixed

Spotter's Badge: Steve

Saturday, 14 May 2016

Grape mystery dullness

Plymouth Herald: Shopper find the number 38 in her grapes. What does it mean?

It means you have the number 38 in Sainsbury's Grape Bingo promotion. Play along at home if you have a Grape Bingo card.

Spotter's Badge: Ray

Friday, 13 May 2016

Paraedolia dullness

Newcastle Chronicle: 'Face' spotted in cloud over Newcastle football ground

It's poor dead Kevin Keegan looking down in despair

Oh, wait, he's not dead.

Spotter's Badge: Huw

Wednesday, 11 May 2016

Trapped arm anger

Watford Observer: Woman gets armed trapped

If I had infinite time, I'd do Complete Idiots in Local Newspapers. There *would* be some overlap, though

Spotter's Badge: TRT

Tuesday, 10 May 2016

Monday, 9 May 2016

Sunday, 8 May 2016

Saturday, 7 May 2016

Hand grenade live blog dullness

Dorset Echo: Dud hand grenade sparks the dullest live blog in the history of journalism

Three minutes the bomb disposal team were on the scene during which the words "You called us out for this?!" were spoken.

Spotter's Badge: Ashley

Thursday, 5 May 2016

Sunday, 1 May 2016